Loving Life

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Hot to get over a break up

The first thing that you should already know is that it's okey to cry.

Have good long cries. It's okey to be hurt and sad, and it's okey to be alone. It's okey to feel like you have messed up - accepting responsibility for your mistakes or shortcomings is healthy. On the other hand, you must also accept that you are a good person, and that you did your best and you're not the only one who made mistakes. Of course, a stage of denial is completely natural, but acceptance is the key to being able to begin to move on.

Let go. Understand that there is no benefit in holding on to heartache, regret, and hatred toward another person. Realize that although it is over, your relationship with that person was unique and special in a lot of ways. You can congratulate yourself for being brave enough to take a risk and fall in love, and encourage your heart that even though love didn't work out this time, there will be a next time.

TIPS

Remember those old catch phrases: "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger", "Everything happens for a reason", "There are other fish in the sea" and most of all, "This too shall pass". When you go through a breakup or some other emotionally challenging time in your life, you're actually getting closer to finding real happiness because you are getting to know your true inner self. This may or may not include other romantic relationships or an eventual long-term union. Whatever happens is okay, no matter what you choose to do in life.

If your ex has left you for another person then ask yourself: if s/he said s/he wanted you back, would you really want him or her? Would you ever trust him not to break your heart again? Would you be hurt, angry, distrustful when he is 10 minutes late calling you, wondering where she is, who he is with?

Every day, find something that will make you smile. Smiling really helps, even at the worst time of your life. You are free to be whoever you want to be now, without thinking "will he/she mind if I do that?". Nothing is more important than you. Love yourself, love life, and when you wake up, SMILE! 

WARNINGS

Do not go day by day and think of them with another person, and how you are supposed to be there with them, and that you are wasting time without them. You broke up for a reason, you may not know the reasoning or how could he/she get with another person so quick, but they did, and you have to move on from it. Don't keep pondering on "you should be there with him/her" because you shouldn't. You should be getting your life back together, and finding happiness in yourself that a new one will come along and sweep you off of your feet.

Don't get "I am never going to find someone else" stuck in your mind. The fear of that is normal after a break up. But you WILL find someone else, and that someone else will make you feel much more complete than who you were with before.

Do not constantly check the time on your phone; thinking what he/she is up to?, are they thinking of you?, or are they out with someone having fun while you are moping around the house! leave your mobile in a room that you are not in or even turn it off, this will also stop you checking to see if they have called or txted and will help stop you from wanting to contact them.

Please remember too that if it didn't work the first time and the second or third time with this person, you have already promised yourself that "this time it will work out" and "if only I had another chance". Youdid, and it didn't, and you do not need any more proof because deep down, you already know that it doesn't work between the two of you. that it's not going to work. For the sake of your heart and your health (emotional and physical), let go and move on.